Saturday, January 29, 2011

One Hand In My Pocket

It has almost been a year since I started writing on my ever changing moods in my ever changing life. What twists and turns a year will bring you. When I started to explore my new paths I was about to embark on, who knew where I would land.

In my ever changing moods, this past year has taught me the art of patience, to take a leap into unknown waters just to see where the waters will take you, to look fear in the eye and laugh and to never underestimate the power and love of family, of friends and of strangers who end up as friends in unexpected ways.

This has definitely been a year of good and bad, give or take, yin and yang. Although, when is life not all of these mixed bag of goods? I guess that is what builds our character, makes us stronger, makes us appreciate the happy times, teaches us how to cope when things are not so happy, makes us resilient, teaches us to never give up, to seek the truth and may the truthful and just people win out over the oafish cads of the world. So, I have learned that on one hand, things can be very good while on the other hand, yes there is always that other hand, on the other hand, things can be a bit murky.

But, on this path of exploration and experimentation, I have come to realize that we need both hands to look at and show us the light. We need the good with the bad to make us stronger and to appreciate when things are good and when to kick ass if needed. It has taught me to be quietly patient, faithful in the good winning out and to look at fear and not run. Take it, analyze it, run with it and then in the end, chalk it up to the other hand.

I look forward to the next year of blogging and charting my course and living my life looking at both hands of life.

Monday, January 24, 2011

The Golden Road

Over the weekend, I was reading all of the fashion blogs that I delve into, daily. I love having a span of time, with nothing else to do, and then lose myself in pictures of fashion and the beauty of the photography that some of my favorite bloggers use.

Here is one of my fav fashion bloggers. I love how she mixes pieces and I think she is just beautiful. She has become the model for Forever 21 and if she ever needed a shopping sidekick, I would want to be first in line to volunteer! She shops in the kind of shops that I like to browse. She doesn't care if something costs only 1.00. A cute find, is a cute find. She mixes high and low end, another one of my fav things to do. She can look like a million bucks, one day, or she can kick it in an outfit of old/vintage/beat up rock star looks....a girl after my own fashion heart.

I loved her recent blog post on vintage shopping in the Haight....I hope to start hitting up these types of shopping trips in my future...

So, just a shout out to wanting to be Her Shopping Assistant...

Or, who knows....own a little space that features eclectic and fab frocks...

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Everyday I Write The Book

I was reflecting on myself over the weekend. I mean, what better subject to reflect on, right? Kidding. But, sometimes, everyone needs to take some time to just stop and sort of think about what they are doing, why they are doing it and making sure that all is well and they still love who they are and what they are accomplishing.

In my ever changing moods, I have learned that I am a better person, a better friend, a better president, a better entrepreneur, a better mom, a better wife, if I am at ease and happy with myself. If I find areas of discord or things that are bringing me down, I assess, recharge and put myself back on track. I am not a person who can wallow or sad sack it around for very long. When I find myself going along these paths, I am the first one to kick myself in the arse and put myself back on the road to happiness.

One of the things that will interfer with my moods faster than anything is when my daily routines are messed up. It's not like I am a 90 year old woman that has to have her oatmeal at 5am, sharp. (Not making fun of 90 year old women.) But, I have ways that I like to run my days and it's been like that from the time I was very young. I am heavy on schedules and lists and cringe at the unstructured and messed up day.

I wake up at the same time, each day. I like to get up around 5am. I need to know that I am up at least an hour before the rest of my house. I drink coffee, have computer time, plan my day, pack lunches, make breakfast and everyone is usually out the door by 8am...and then my day begins. The entire house needs to be organized, dishes put away, laundry put away...everything in it's place and then I can move on.

It's the same with my bread business. I have a certain order of breads that make. I know that the coffee house features four varieties for the lunch service. I have to bake them in a certain order. If I baked the herbed breads before the plain breads, I am done. It has be be a certain order. If I am baking rolls AND breads, I have to make the loaves first.

I run my closet and outfit planning in the same way. I have a huge collection of clothing in a huge closet that spills out into the guest suite of my house. Shoes and handbags take up alcove space. To some, it looks like a complete mess. To me, it is exactly as it should be. It's my system and if I try to be all neat and tidy and get tons of fancy bins and containers and fancy hangers, I lose it. I love the disarray of my closet, the scent of my perfume, the colors and textures of it all.

I know that it would seem my closet would be a model after say, Patrick Bateman's in American that was an organized closet...and then he was a complete madman. I take the complete maddening closet to make me sane and happy. With the rest of my life running like clockwork, I guess I have to have one area that is a free for all.

I am getting ready to launch yet another venture. More info. to come, later, but the ironic part is that it will be a model after my own closet and heart. I just have to laugh because I will have one venture, the bread, that is all about organization and exact planning. So, it makes sense that I need another venture for the other part of my brain. The unorganized part.

So, yes, like this Elvis Costello lyric...Everyday, everyday, everyday...I feel like this is my mantra, each morning, as I set about my routines. I need the balance of the organized so that I can embrace the unorganized part of me, love what I am doing and continue to love me. If half of my life is completely on schedule, everyday is a good day.

Sunday, January 16, 2011

Animal House

When I took off back in October and went on blogging hiatus, quite a few things have happened. One of them was that the cheerleader was accepted into her first choice of colleges!!

In my ever changing moods, college seemed like something that would happen much later. In reality, college is happening, right now. Well, all of the work leading up to her actually leaving. But, when the ball dropped to welcome in 2011, my heart skipped a beat because this is now graduation year. College is our next stop.

She seemed to be so confident that she would be accepted that she decided against applying to any of the other colleges we had visited. So, she got her application in, her letters of recommendation, her trascripts and then we waited. A few weeks went by and then one late afternoon, I went to get the mail. I saw the letter from the university in the mailbox. The cheerleader was about to start football cheer practice for the afternoon but I was able to reach her on her cell phone. I told her the letter would be here, waiting. She asked me to open it and read it to her. She had all of her friends and cheerleaders around her and as I read the phrase...We are pleased to inform was nothing but screams, squeals, yelling and tears. She was happy!!

Her choice of university just happens to be my university. So, not only am I a proud mom, I am also overjoyed and hopeful that she will have the same happy experience that I did at the same university. I like that I can mentally picture her future dorm. When she gives me her class schedule, I will know the path across campus she will take to each building. I will be able to "see" her at rush parties for sorority. I will know the football stadium where she will now be cheering on a new team as we bid her high school team, goodbye. I hope that at each turn, there will be a friend like V or V, S or S...some of my best pals in college.

When we attended our final campus visit for Spotlight Days, I told myself that I would not fall in love with the campus, all over again. But, standing on the campus streets, with the sun streaming through the fall leaves, soaking in all of the memories and richness of the history of the school, I looked over at the cheerleader's face. She was beaming with excitement. She and I both knew, at that moment in time, that she would be next to walk the campus beautiful.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

2011 Let the blogging resume!!

Happy New Year, dusting off things at the ole blog...I've been crazy, I've been busy but I have missed my dear blog. Let the games begin in the new year. Love to you all if you are still following!!