Saturday, May 29, 2010

Best Of My Love

I am asking you, my fans and followers, to please take a minute and let me know what post or posts have been your favs from, My Ever Changing Moods, so far. I need to compile a Best Of page for a blogging site and I could go through and pick mine but I would really, really like to hear from all of you!!! Comment here or on the fan page...thanks, and as always, I think you all are simply the best!!!


It's Saturday and it's an exciting weekend for me. I have been waiting for this weekend since January. This is the weekend that I finally go to see Carole King and James Taylor in concert! I am so excited for this and may not sleep until tomorrow night.

This concert is to be an intimate affair with two of the music world's most legendary pair. It will be a tribute to the first time they played on stage, together, at the famous, Troubador! They are recreating the show with their original band members. I have followed the California music scene of the 60s and 70s like it's my job and this upcoming concert thrills me beyond words!! I wonder if I could stalk them, somehow, and ask them to sign my, Canyon Of Dreams book? Maybe not.

Anyway, like every Saturday, I like to just throw suggestions out...if you are looking for a really mellow and really wonderful and iconic album to listen to over the holiday, grab the Tapestry album (cd/download)...I know, I know, I date myself with the album talk.

If you remember the music, the first time around, rediscover it. If you were too young and have never listened to it, do me a favor and find it and just sit and listen. Songwriters/singers/album visionaries don't come along very often. She is an icon, paved the road for many female singers and makes my ever changing moods swoon.

Have a great holiday weekend, be safe, be happy, be respectful of the reason we celebrate, Memorial Day.

Friday, May 28, 2010

Telephone Line

The other day, I posted about getting a phone call and had a little memory flashback to when I had to shut myself in the pantry just to have a private conversation on the family phone.

Yesterday, I had a hair appointment and had to go to a different hair stylist then I normally visit. She and I started talking and laughing about phones and cell phones. Phones must be the running theme of my week because last night at the awards night, the principal cautioned the kids about texting and to turn off all cell phones. Some parents sitting around me started to grumble about kids/phones/texting and how in the minds of the teens, they would crumble up without a cell or without texting abilities. I am usually quick to laugh at that but last night, my mind flashed back to my hairstylist and our phone conversation and it really made me think.

Are the teens, today, really that much different then the teens (my generation) of the mid to late 1970s? I mean, I realize the downfall of the teens of today and their communication skills and their inability for many of them to use proper spelling and the rudeness of public texting and the rudeness of the public phone conversations. And, I know this because I have blogged about it. And, yes, many adults are just like teens and don't know when to just shut it down.

But, my thought process wasn't about all the above. My thought process transported me back to my days of a young teen. Let's face it, teen lives have always centered around a telephone. But, in the 70s, you couldn't very well rip the wall phone out of the kitchen and take it with you to make calls. We were actually prisoners of our house telephones and prisoners of our houses until that very important phone call came through. I mean, if you were hoping for that one hottie to call and schedule a date, or if you were waiting for plans with friends or if you were waiting on a call to tell where the weekend party would take place, you had no choice but to wait. Like, sit right next to the phone. If you got in the shower, and the call came through, you missed the ring, and you were out of luck. My younger brother would basically take no messages for me nor would he tell me I even had any calls. If you left the house, and missed the call, you would be driving around aimlessly with no date and no friends with no clue where the party was because we didn't have cell phones with us.

So you sat and watched television and did homework and listened to music and painted your fingernails all while waiting for the phone. Just like the teens of today being chained to their cell phones, we were chained to our house phones.

The concept is not new on the telephone topic. We all planned our lives around phone calls. We just couldn't be mobile about it. We weren't connected 24/7 to everyone in the universe. But secretly, and I will never tell my teen this, a cell phone would have been a great item to have for my teen social life. I cannot even count the wasted hours that went by as I sat waiting for the phone to ring. And, just to be sure the phone was in working order, you picked up really quickly to check for the dial tone. Only to quickly hang up and hoped that the important call did not come through in that second.

Teens and phones...I really do believe it's not a new concept but I think it taught us patience and it gave us time to get things done while waiting for the important call and it taught us that instant gratification was not going to happen. Teens of today do not know the art of the anticipated phone call and the elation felt when the phone rang and it was that person or people. They get all of their calls and texts in the flash of a second from 100 people all at once.

I sort of like that I was part of one of the last generations that planned their lives around staring at a silent phone. I learned a lot in the long time spans of waiting. How could you not when it was only you, a silent phone and your stereo...

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Once In A Lifetime

The recurring lyric in the title song keeps asking...How did I get here? I have found myself singing this song quite often, these past few weeks.

In my ever changing moods, it has finally hit me. Things are changing, kids are growing, life is moving in the ultra fast lane and there I am standing in the middle of the madness with the recurring lyric playing in the soundtrack of my head.

I know that the cheerleader has one more year of school. Thank goodness!!! By this time next year, you all will be begging me to be sedated, sending me cases of wine or telling me to simply, ZIP IT. (hahaha, shout out to my fav show) But, for different reasons, this year coming to an end, is making me look back on life and really wonder where did the time go?

The cheerleader is driving, she is very independent and except for the large wads of cash that she needs from us on a daily basis, she is pretty self-sufficient. She thinks and operates all on her own. I have been fast forwarding to this time next year and have already started planning her graduation soiree. Yes, I am a party planner and if I thought people would hire me in the town where Maggie's Farm is located, I would try to parlay it into a business.

This weekend is our last dance recital. We started recitals when the cheerleader was in first grade. Her hair was in shiny blonde ponytails and she was dressed in a poodle skirt doing a tap dance to, Rock Around The Clock with a seque into, It's My Party. This year, she drives and she will have plans after the recital. No more celebration dinner after. No more Mommy/Daughter day of recital when she got beautified and a manicure and sat while I put all of her makeup on for her performance. She does it all on her own,now. She will perform her tap solo and her gymnastics for the last time. She just won't have time to be in a recital, next year, when we are GASP...busy with graduation.

This coming week will find us going to our second college visit. The first visit was in October and we went to the college that I attended. I cried as we pulled into the parking lot of campus. She told me she was not walking on campus with me crying. But, who wouldn't cry at the sight of their old college that they had just brought their own daughter to now visit????

It will be the last summer of 4H and the cheerleader's goat projects. When you live in the country, you take lifestock 4H. She started out taking fashion 4H and won many awards and then shifted to goats. What a laugh a minute that summer was with our first goat. And, the cheerleader surprised everyone by winning her division and her class with that crazy goat. Trophies and ribbons, galore. So, she is now working with goat number 4, this summer, and it will be the last fair of goat shows.

As a cheerleader, she will attend her last cheer camps and will host her last peewee cheer camp. Instead of being the new, incoming cheerleaders, her group will be the leaders and role models and overall helpers to the coaches. It will be our year of Senior Nights at games. It's a senior year with the last homecoming, last prom. It will be a celebration of the bittersweet, all year.

I am happy for all of this!! The trip down memory lane isn't meant to be sad. I am proud of the young lady that now stands before me. She is a shiny, happy, almost adult ready to pave her way after next year. Sometimes I still catch glimpses of the little girl riding her Barbie bike, driving her Barbie jeep and seeing how high she can swing on her swingset. Those are the flashes in memory when I ask myself, just how exactly did I get here?

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Wordy Rappinghood

Not only is today's title one of my fav club songs of the early 80's but it also reminds me of a phone call I had, this morning. I have a good friend that I don't get to talk to nearly enough. Our hours never seem to coincide. She is always running out the door in the mornings and I am always crazy in the evenings. We do try to make time to talk once or twice a month and when we do, it's a marathon of talking. We know that it will be a few weeks until we talk, again, so we each need to make sure that we get all details covered.

In my ever changing moods, I realize that I am of an age where I really like to get old school phone calls on my old school landline. I like looking at the caller id and seeing that it is a good friend that I do not get to talk to as often as I would like. Today, when I viewed that she was calling, I got an instant smile on my face.

Do you have someone that calls you that instantly puts you in a good mood? A talky, talky mood? Do you have someone that calls and shares good times, sad times, worried times, frustrating times and gossip times? It's the best kind of phone call. We have known each other for a number of years. We both have daughters the same age and we are able to reassure each other that our daughter is not from another planet and no, we really are not losing our minds. We can laugh about things in life, we can help each other through worried times...and we have each had our worried times, we have cried over losses and shared notes on the usual suspects around town that we both find amusing and loathe at the same time. Our conversations can run really long or just long enough for the other to report in on something we just know will make the other one laugh.

We try to have periodic coffee dates but the phone is our usual choice of visiting. It's easy, it doesn't require leaving the house on a busy day and we know that we each have the other's undivided attention as we begin our conversation dance. We are both avid and fast talkers. So, a long time ago, we learned how to do this conversation dance so that we did not seem rude as we continued to cut off a sentence to jump to the next topic or sentence. It's a dance that only comes with time and familiarity and fondness. If neither of us are in a rush, we have lengthy conversations. If one of us is rushed, the other picks up on it and we do a speeedy run through of the condensed version of what's been happening. We know how to get to the most important stuff, let the other comment/laugh/gasp, move on and then hang up. It's the dance of friendship and conversation and the lost art of actually talking, not texting, on a phone.

When I hang up with her or any of my old school friends that still use landline phones, I am struck at how comforted I feel. It takes me back to when the family rotary phone hung in our kitchen when I was growing up. To have any privacy, you had to lock yourself in the kitchen pantry. You developed the conversation dance way back then. You knew people were lurking outside the pantry door so you had to be stealth like in what you said, outloud, what you silently implied and what you faked your way through in code talk. AKA code to throw your mother off on the fact that you were planning to travel out of town to a forbidden concert but making her think you were going to hang with said friend and have a sleepover at said friend's house. We were masters at this conversation dance.

Those days are long gone and I don't have to speak in code, I rarely get landline calls and if I want to travel out of town to a concert, I don't have to have a code. So, when my phone rings and it's a good friend, I know to grab a cup of coffee, settle in, and start the dance of conversation with a friend.

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Working Girl

This is the time of year when I go into overdrive. It seems like May has become the new December, if that makes sense. If you are a mom, you know what I am saying. December is busy and crazy and jam packed with obligations, holiday parties, shopping, baking, gift wrapping. May is the spring holiday season. End of the year school wrap up, exams, prom, graduation, graduation parties, all end of the year school assemblies, honor awards nights, sports awards nights, lots and lots of clubs, teams and schools all needing money, donations, drop offs. I had a few out of the ordinary things thrown in this month and now that the month is coming to an end, a busy end, my head is still spinning.

Getting the necessary end of the year obligations over with leaves me feeling behind on all of the outside work I like to be busy with at this time of year. For the first year, ever, we have hired landscapers to do all of the mulching, mulch prep work, weeding and fertilizing. The job seems to get bigger, every year, and we seem to have less and less time, each year. Currently, there is a mountain of mulch in the drive that rivals Mt. Rushmore. I am just happy that it doesn't need Mr. Man and me to distribute it all.

In my ever changing moods, it seems like the more time I have now that I am no longer the Secretary of Transportaion, finds me with less time to get things done. I am not sure how that works out. I do think that it is because I end up volunteering for outside fundraisers and the like that take me away from home. After this weekend, my plan is to try to remain, at home, focused, and working like a machine.

I am going to stain the whole deck, front and back and all of the stairs. I used to do this job and it looks nice when I do it and lasts quite a few years. The past couple of times we have hired it out and it lasts all of six months. What is up with that? Well, I will tell you...I do it the old school way with the stain and a brush and take my time. The people we hire use a sprayer that leaves a flimsy coat on that immediately starts to peel. Not to mention the fact that they also spray the windows, the deck furniture and anything else that takes a second to move out of the way. Mr. Man and I have always been along the lines of do it yourself kind of people. We get the job done and we get it done right. Hey, maybe once I am done and tally up the money saved in labor, I will take myself on a major shoe shopping spree!!! I can kick back and admire a good job, well done, in some spectacular new heels.

I am cursed with a good work ethic. Well, it's my kind of work ethic even if Mr. Man sometimes thinks it's the work ethic of a crazy person. My grandfather was a do it yourself, Mr. Fix-it, all work from sun up to sun down. I got to be his sidekick for many years. We painted, we hammered, we cleaned, we organized, we weeded, we hauled things. I carry that with me, today. In our household, there is no such thing as guy jobs and girl jobs. For one, Mr. Man is rarely home due to the nature of our business. If I waited for him to get home to do the guy jobs, well, things would be in a sad state of affairs. I take tools and fix things, I paint, I stain, I mow, I take trash out, I weed, I dangle from high places on ladders to work at things on the house. I am a full function girl/guy worker!! I take it all in stride and just do the jobs. I realize that it's easy since I am a SAHM but I am just one that jumps in and gets it all done.

So, right now, I have a staining project, I need to plant all of my herbs, I need to pot flowers for the front porch, need to buy all of the hanging ferns for the front porch and I am tossing around building my own raised veggie garden.

May is almost over and I need to get on track. This is when I put on my working girl clothes and revisit my grandfather's sun up to sun down work strategy. It's spring....Merry Christmas, er, May!! It's basically just as busy, just no gifts waiting for you.

Monday, May 24, 2010

Summertime Superman

As promised, I am giving a rundown of the winners of the first challenge/contest on My Ever Changing Moods. It's the Summer of 2010 playlist that was compiled by fans and their suggestions!! I look forward to putting the playlist on my Ipod and playing loudly in my convertible, all summer!!

Thanks for the great responses!!! It was fun to see the suggestions and what some of the songs meant to my fans.

The contest was fun and yes, the answer to the question....What scares me in the kitchen? was...baking!!! If you read one of my early posts, Muffin Man, you will remember how I freeze and get blurred vision at the mere mention of baking. Yes, I do bake simple items like muffins but if given an elaborate baking recipe...I freeze in terror. My mind just won't go there. I do it but it terrifies me.

The three winners who answered first and answered correctly were...Myra, Dawn and Kathy!!! Congrats, girls!!! A copy of the playlist will be winging itself to each of you to enjoy all summer!!

The final playlist was this...(I might add that if there was an award to most songs submitted, it would have to go to Chris. Following him would be Lynn!! WTG, fans!)

My Ever Changing Moods Summer of 2010 Playlist:

1. Born To Run...Bruce Springsteen (Donna)
2. Jungleland...Bruce Sprinsteen (Donna)
3. Let The Good Times Roll...The Cars (Lisa)
4. All Summer Long...Kid Rock (Kathy)
5. Sweet Emotion...Aerosmith (Dawn)
6. Summertime...Kenny Chesney (Betsy)
7. I Want You To Want Me...Cheap Trick (Chris)
8. Train In Vain...The Clash (Chris)
9. Summer Of '69...Bryan Adams (LynneR)
10. Heart Of Glass...Blondie (Autumn)
11. Sweet Talking Woman...ELO (Autumn)
12. Emotional Rescue...The Rolling Stones (Jennifer)
13. Good Vibrations...The Beach Boys (Marlene)
14. Rikki Don't Lose That Number...Steely Dan (Myra)
15. Fox On The Run...Sweet...(LynnB)
16. Go All The Way...The Raspberries...(LynnB)

Remember to keep checking back for the next music challenge and contest!

The most essential part of summer is the music. Summer tunes are made for fun in the sun!! Crank up the tunes and let the summer fun begin!

Purple Rain

Yesterday was my friend, L's, birthday. She has been my friend since the summer before our freshman year in high school. We recently were lucky enough to reconnect over Thanksgiving and that makes me so happy! They say there's nothing like the love of an old friend and I truly believe that. Who else would see you through years of bad hair days, bad fashion choices, broken hearts, high school drama and let's face it, some years of total geekdom and still love you? Who would tell you that your home perm really didn't look like a frizz mop and who else would help you with tests for an entire year in Geometry? When the chips are down, who are you going to turn to? Your bff, plain and simple.

Our friendship started at band camp before our freshman year. I was filtering into the high school from the smallest school of the three that filtered in. My mother thought I should join marching band. I am not quite sure why because my trumpet playing left A LOT to be desired. Like, last seat, at all times. Truthfully, I hated playing the trumpet and really wanted to play the drums. I was forced into some hand me down trumpet. My brother, mysteriously, got to play drums. Shiny, new drums. I had a tarnished trumpet. Still a sore point. Anyway, I entered into marching band, we headed off to band camp (I know, I know..This one time at band camp...) and I met L and some of her friends from her school. I don't remember details but we all got along and L and I struck up a friendship that would last to this day.

I won't go into our many adventures, triumphs, failures, embarrassments, groundings and broken hearts of those years. Our high school times were a mixed bag of the best of times and the worst of times. I wouldn't trade them for the world.

L and I ventured off to college at the same university. It really wasn't L's scene and she understandably transferred to a university that she felt better suited her over Christmas break. I decided to stay at the university we started and both of us found enjoyable college experiences. We reunited during summer breaks and quickly fell back into our easy patterns of hanging out, 24/7. We both worked at the mall, we would work, lay in the sun as much as we could, found parties in the evenings and never missed a happy hour at any given establishment.

The summer that will always stand out in my mind and would end up being our greatest memory of all time was a summer that we like to call, The Purple Rain Summer. It was the summer between our sophomore and junior years. The details are fuzzy but the fun remains etched in my mind.

For some reason that we still cannot recall, L's parents decided to vacation all summer, that summer. Much to our surprise and delight, they were leaving L home, alone, like.....what??? I know I stress this, often, but times were different back then and parents did leave us all alone, a lot. They would leave us with food and money and a list of instructions. But, no parents had left for a summer. With L having free reign over her house! We were free...Hello Summer of Fun!!

It was also the summer that the Prince movie, Purple Rain was released. I remember that we went with a group of friends to see it after we got off work at the mall. That was a great benefit of being a mall rat. We sat and L and I were blown away by Purple Rain. Now, it is always in the category as one of the best rock musicals of all times and is a cult classic. Back then, we had no idea it would make history. We just knew that we loved, were obsessed with it and returned to see it many times for as long as it was playing at the local theatre. MTV was still a rockin' force, back then, and whenever the Purple Rain soundtrack would play a song, we would stop and just stare at the tv while it played.

This was the same time that L's parents went off on their trip. I don't remember where they went or how long they were to be gone but I do remember moving busloads of stuff to L's house, working two jobs that summer, staying up all night, most nights and surviving on little sleep, lots of caffeine and yes, the wine. With all of our socializing and Purple Raining, that summer, we also met a whole bunch of people, all the time. New people and old friends we were reaquainting with. Actually, we knew no enemies, that summer. Back then, again, things were not as scary as they are now and you could invite strangers to your home and have 2am cookouts. Well, okay, it does sound scary, now, and we were probably very lucky to survive but hey...we were young and it was the summer of '84. We didn't care. Our cookouts were where we got some of our earliest cooking lessons. We grilled, everything. And, we learned how to make the most awesome baked beans using Lambrusco wine..who knew? In fact, we added wine to everything that summer. Purple wine, Purple Rain...

Of course, like all good things, the summer of '84 had to come to a close. Her parents were returning, I think my mother was just noticing that I had gone missing for the whole summer and we had to pack for college. It was probably a good thing because how much more fun could two college age girls have on a summer on their own? A lot, I am sure of it, but after 50,000 trips to the movies to see Purple Rain, about that many cookouts, holding crazy work schedules and club hopping and concert going, it was time to give our livers, er, brains a was time to move back to college and get serious, again. Oh, I make myself laugh. Serious? Us?

But, it's so fun to have one summer that is so packed with good times and good fun and good memories. Many details to The Purple Rain Summer will remain under the lock and key of our own private stash of memories but it was a great memory of a great friendship that I am happy to still be a part of.

Happy Birthday, L!! We are in our second half of our forties and still rockin' it!

Comfortably Numb

I truly wish I Instead, I am more along the lines of Franctically Frenzied. But, I like the lyrics of the song as a way of finding my way back to my blog.

Is there anybody in there?
Just nod if you can hear me.
Is there anyone at home?

The past week found me with just too much activity and too much to get done. This week is already so jammed with things to do and things to get done but I just try to take each day as it comes and then cross it off the list. The weekend gets even crazier, next weekend, but I am confident, that someday soon, life will return to just the fast paced and not the frantically frenzied pace that it has been.

In my ever changing moods, I need to remember to attack things, one at a time, instead of trying to get it all done in one Monday morning.

So, I am back, and I may bog you down with a few posts, all at once, today. I apologize but once I get back into my rountine, the more comfortable I am. Enjoy the beautiful Monday and grab a cup of coffee. I have a feeling I will need quite a few pots of it, today.

Saturday, May 22, 2010

Everybody's Working For The Weekend

Or, in my case, I am WORKING, this weekend. I am in charge of selling sodas at a memorial fundraiser. I have been crazy busy since I posted that I was going to see my friend, Dawn, and I am sorry for neglecting my blog.

After today, time should once again be on my side and I can start daily blogging, again. When I return, I have a special birthday tribute, the winners of the first contest and the posting of the playlist for summer 2010 and my suggestion Saturday!

Much love until we meet, again!!

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Summer Breeze

I know that the current weather says something different, right now, in many places, but I am hopeful that summer breezes are right around the corner.

Today, I am taking off to meet up with my pal, Dawn!! We are going to embarrass,er, visit her sweet son at college, take him to dinner and then she and I are going to have some girl time at a hotel!

So, today is a great day to finish the little contest that was started a couple of weeks ago. The Ever Changing Moods Summer 2010 summer playlist!! I have received all song suggestions along with an entire book from one fan!! I will have to decide on a few from his favs, of course!!

I am going to award copies of the summer playlist to three people!! All you have to do, while I am gone, is answer a really easy question. If you are a fan, it will be an easy one!! You can either answer on my blog page or my Facebook fan page. To be eligible, you had to have turned in a song suggestion!! When I get back, I will look at all answers. The correct answers will win. If there are more than three correct answers, I will look at the time stamps of all entries and will have to go with the first three people!! Good luck and I love you for following me!!

Early in my blogging stages, I posted about something that scares me in the kitchen. Can you remember?

That's it!! Good luck!!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

Tumbling Dice

Today is our anniversary and we have been married for 19 years!! Mr. Man and I actually had our very first date, in 1984, though. We took things slow and as I have said, here, before, had the longest dating history of all time, I think.

In my ever changing moods, I love looking back over the years at all of our memories. We had our moments, good and bad, and somehow grew up, decided we were ready to get married and made the big leap. I could bore you with our crazy turning love story but instead, I am just going to tell you about one of my favorite memories of us. It is a memory that Mr. Man probably has no recollection of since it is my memory and a defining point in time when I went from trying to ignore his presence to actually thinking, um, hey...I am developing a small crush of sorts.

I have known Mr. Man since I was in kindergarten. We started at the same elementary school, together, until he moved to another school. But, he was the kind of kid that everyone either knew or knew of. So, even when he wasn't around, you knew of him. He was like any pre-teen/teen boy. Full of himself, too cute for words, very sure of himself and always had a string of girlfriends. I was not one of those girlfriends nor did I want to be. I don't know what made me so irritated with Mr. Man back then but I just didn't care for him. In my junior year of high school, I got seperated from all of my friends and the prime locker locations. My locker was down in nowhere land by the cafeteria and wrestling room. I was highly irritated to not be where the action was and the only thing worse than this was getting seperated from all of my friends at our lunch, too. What did I do to deserve this?? Junior year was not looking good and then I looked over to the locker that was two lockers down from mine. Uggh...Mr. Man. Always very suave with the ladies and he had a dozen at his locker at all times. I spent the entire year being irritated with his locker presence.

Eventually, his class graduated, we moved up to be seniors, things went back to normal in lockerville and all was well. Mr. Man went off to college, none of us gave that class a second thought and all of a sudden, we were graduating. It was the summer between graduation and our destinations to college. Life was grand and the plan was to work and play. We were ready for anything.

Summers where I grew up would find everyone at the parks on the west end of town. There were two parks that sort of filtered into one. Everyone, and I mean everyone, took their cars to these parks. It was bumper to bumper cruising, music blaring, frisbees soaring. People would sit on cars, sit on the ground, the cars would move at a snail's pace. It was where the action was and where everyone went to be seen. There didn't seem to be a lot of traffic laws, back then, since you were allowed to pile a ton of people in each car. Someone would always have cheap cases of beer, again, it was the very early 80s and we were all of age to drink. Go figure. Anyway, I would have the cheerleader's head if she pulled a stunt like this but I was the 80s, we were of age, and apparently none of our parents gave us a second thought.

On one particular night, the cruising was happening and it was a Thursday night. Thursday nights were usually great nights for a couple of the bars in town. We would cruise the parks, first, and then head to wherever all of our friends were meeting. Somehow, on this night, I got seperated from the car I was with and Mr. Man offered to let me ride with him. Hmmmmm...I wasn't sure but jumped in, anyway. He had a car with t-tops and he had The Stones blaring. I remember the song, Tumbling Dice, playing and it was at that second, with the summer air, Tumbling Dice, and Mr. Man giving me a ride to my destination, that I had my first inklings of a small crush beginning.

That summer seemed to put us in the same locations and parties, a lot. He gave me other rides, at random times. One time, somehow, I ended up with one of his Grateful Dead cassettes. I remember listening to it over and over for the rest of the summer. I took it to college with me and to this day, I still have it in my collection of cassettes.

I remember the summer coming to an end, I packed up and headed for college, Mr. Man was never aware of my small crush or his missing cassette tape, and I left town. Our paths never crossed, again, like they had that summer. It was a summer where the electricity of a small crush made it burn bright in my memory. We would not go out on our first date for another two years but I carried the vision of him driving his car, listening to Tumbling Dice and watching his long hair blow in the wind to this day.

Happy Anniversary, Mr. Man...I love you even more than I did when you gave me the ride in your car. Even if you weren't aware of my crush...

Monday, May 17, 2010

Not In These Shoes

Over the weekend, I was going through some of my magazines and one magazine that was dedicated, totally, to the upcoming movie release of my fav show of all time! I delved into the magazine and then I followed that by viewing a marathon of my dvds of the show. I like to put them on while I am working around the house. The show can still transport me even while performing the most mundane of household duties.

In my ever changing moods, there will never be another show, to me, that will ever come close to Sex And The City. It was a one of a kind. A classic. A once in a lifetime experience. And, once again, we, the fans, are about to be able to revisit four of our old friends. When the second movie premieres, masses of women will be there to cheer, cry, laugh, bond, and smile. Our hearts will soar with happiness and our heads will want to go out and shop!!! We will toast them with Cosmos and we will wear our best cocktail attire to the theatre. Fans of the show, true fans, know what I am talking about. It will once again be time to celebrate women and friendship. Because, although these women were just characters in a make believe world, they represented something so foreign to women, today. They represented real freindship. Honest, loyal, supportive, mature friendship. I wish we had this, again, today.

In the magazine, I was reading interviews given by each of the four women. Sarah Jessica Parker made a statement that said if they were to start the show, now, she just didn't think that they would. And, it wasn't because the characters were now older or that the economy was different or that New York was was because, and this made me really sad, there would be no interest in the story of four girlfriends who genuinely liked to be together. Of course, a bit of the problem would still be the new economy, new politics and a very post 9/11. Let's face it, the other big attractions to the show were the city, the excesses, the fashion, the recklessness. But, the core, the never falterng core, was the friendship.

It makes me so sad and so nostaligic for this show when I watch some of the so called reality shows of today that claim to be about friends. I am guilty of tuning into the Bravo Housewives shows but lately, they just make me sad. There seems to be so much emphasis on tearing one another apart, showcasing jealousy, bad mouthing, dragging names through the mud that it makes me cringe. And, it makes me miss the four wide eyed girls that we first met in 1998.

I had no idea what to expect when this show premiered. I remember wanting to check it out, made sure the very young cheerleader was tucked into bed, hurried Mr. Man through dinner and then excused myself to watch the show in private. It premiered, it was love at first sight, and I was a fan to the end. That was back before Tivo or dvrs. We were at the mercy of the pesky vcrs to do our taping for us. So, there was no rewinding, mid action, to see something you may have missed. I began a habit of shutting myself into a room to view each Sunday. I accepted no phone calls, nothing. I permitted nobody to watch with me because I wanted no babble while it was on. For 30 minutes, you totally lost yourself in the friendship and fabulousness. It was a defining show for women. It showed us that yes, girlfriends were important! Yes, fashion was important! Women shopped in droves. It brought back glamour, it brought back sky high heels, it brought back handbags and most importantly, it brought us the idea that anything was possible as long as you had your friends.

Maybe that is what is wrong with some of the women and girls of today. They don't have four pals to view and fall in love with and want to have girlfriends just like them. They only get to see shows that feature catfights, tantrums, bad fashion and all out vulgar behavior.

Sometimes, I like to put my dvds in, close my eyes, imagine that it is once again, 1998, and the friendship circle is just starting, all over again. A time when the magic of caring was more important in a friendship than the fights we see on so called friendship shows, now.

If you were a fan, you know what I am talking about. If you weren't a fan, or at the time, not old enough to be a fan, it's not too late. Grab some dvds and be prepared to view friendship, the way it was meant to be.

Saturday, May 15, 2010

Wild Thing

I am sitting here, on a Saturday morning, with music blaring from the cheerleader's room. It is rare that she is even here, alone, on a Saturday morning, without her posse that travels with her. It is odd that she is awake so early and that she did not spend the night, elsewhere. She had to babysit, last night, so I guess that put a cramp in her style. When you get used to them either being gone or ignoring you when friends are here, it's sort of jarring to have so much activity accompanied by the loud music and the dancing and jumping up and down. Her room is on an upper level so it sounds like the dishes will start to fly out of the kitchen cabinets due to so much vibration.

In my ever changing moods, I enjoy having her home even if she is LOUD. But, honestly, the apple didn't fall far from the tree with her love of music. She gets it from Mr. Man and me and surprisingly, today, her music is a choice of 80s new wave!! This is so much better than her usual music choices. For one, I can bebop while typing. For another, I can sing to all of the songs because I actually understand the words. And, it is so funny that this is her music choice because my love of 80s new wave and late 70s/early 80s punk rock have been on my mind, all week.

I am a really mellow chick, most of the time. I have a love for classic rock, Dead, songs of the 60s/70s/80s/90s. I can be a hippie chick or I can revisit my love of punk and new wave and be just as happy. I don't really remember when or how I started listening to punk and new wave but as soon as I heard the driving beat of the songs and started the fast paced dancing, I knew it was for me. It is such an adrenaline rush once you start jumping up and down to the beat. My first small punk concerts that I attended were probably late in my high school years. Back then, you could get into clubs at the age of 18. If you weren't 18, you could sneak in rather easily. Dark, hole in the wall, reeking with the smell of beer and sweat clubs. Most of them were painted black with really jarring lighting. The bands would take the stage, start their fast paced shows, take no break, start throwing beer at the fans, started to remove their clothing, the crowd would begin to slam dance even crazier and a good time was had by all. Good people up in the mosh pit. Sort of like fellow deadheads at a Dead concert except way more revved up and we traded our tie dye attire for black boots, thrift store ruffled skirts and motorcycle jackets. Or mini skirts, boots, motorcycle jackets, lots of big hair.

Being at the front of the stage, where all the action was, a total must! It wasn't fun until you started getting slammed into, thrown around and had beer blasted all over the place. But, the music was the best. Once the punk of the 80s started to fizzle, I took up listening to a lot of ska. A lot of the same beats with great, jamming songs.

So, listening to the cheerleader's choice of music, this morning, is making me smile and bringing back a whole lot of slam dancing memories. In that time frame we were wild things. My fav version of Wild Things has always been the version performed by one of my all time fav punk bands, X. I have seen them quite a few times, over the years, and most recently, two years ago. There is nothing like an X concert so if they do tour, again, they are a must see. The lead singer, Exene, is the goddess of all punk, in my opinion. She has been ill so fans are hoping that a tour will once again happen!

It's Saturday! The weather at Maggie's Farm is rockin, I am taking Elle Woods out for a spin and making a punk playlist for my Ipod to take with me. Go ahead, check out some vintage punk bands and rock your day!!!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

Fun, Fun, Fun

Okay...the summer playlist challenge was so much fun and thanks to all who gave playlist suggestions!!! There were a lot!!!! I am going to compile the first official My Ever Changing Moods Summer 2010 Playlist and put it on my Ipod. Then, I am going to put the playlist on cd and one of the lucky participants will get a chance to answer a special question and the person who answers it right, will get the playlist on a cd to kick off your summer fun!!! Keep checking back for the final playlist and the question....good luck!!!!

If you wanted to submit a song to the playlist, I will keep it open until Saturday. So, if you want to be a part of the fun, submit a song, here, or on my fan page. We need to start rockin' in the summer fun!!

What's The Story, Morning Glory?

For some reason, this week, I have a question on my mind. I am not sure how it started or why it started but I keep asking myself this over and over. Who or what decides the age where you are supposed to act or feel old or older? What's the story on this? I have been awake, each morning this week, wondering.

In my ever changing moods, I feel very young at heart, youthful and vibrant. I have friends of all ages and I am comfortable in any age group. Well, I don't have friends who are teens. I am the mom of a teen and want to keep that persona going. I don't want to be perceived as the cool mom who is trying to still be cool teen. I know, I know, who likes to be perceived as lame but seriously, being perceived as the cool mom (and we all know that we ARE cool) is the kiss of death. Anyway, my mind is just so confused.

A few weeks ago, the cheerleader and I were in the kitchen and talking while she was making a snack and I was having a cup of coffee. She was telling me about someone's mom and how they reminded her of me. I found this interesting and decided to use this moment of honesty to ask her what about the other mom reminded her of me? She said, well, she is still pretty and seems young and dresses like you do. Fair cheerleader didn't realize it but she had just given me enough vain praise to get me through the next 30 years. But, in reality, I kept a straight face and silently did my happy dance in my head.

To paint a picture of myself...I do look young. I don't know why. I am smallish, still wear long hair, have the brain of a pre-teen (not always, but there are days)...I don't really know the reasons but even my doctor seems amazed, each year, when I am there for my physical and has to glance back at my chart to be sure she is supposed to be talking hormone replacement therapy and not family planning...I will say that my beloved grandparents were youngish acting and looking well into their 80s and early 90s. My grandfather was a big kid at heart who was always humming a tune while he worked and taught me many a dance step. Anyway...I have been chugging along, happy with the status quo, basking in the fact that my teen thinks I am young!!

Then, mother brought me an armload of magazines, the other day. My mother is sort of the anti-joy killer. Love her as I do, she knows how to be a great buzz kill. She thinks she is being helpful when she points out that I won't have my looks forever, I should start slowing down, pointing out the height of my heels, how a simple allergy cough is certain to be the onset of a lung cancer like disease (I don't smoke, never have) and when I take off for journeys to visit friends, she wants to know if I have my "things" in order??? She's my mother, I love her, I respect her, but we clearly come from totally different pods. So, as she handed me these new magazines, they were not the Vogue, Elle, Marie Claire, InStyle of my usual magazine haul. These were mags geared to women who have drying skin, sagging skin, thinning/drying hair, the woman who has lost her zest for life, the middle age spread, how to dress in your elderly her as I do, she totally wrecked my feel good image that I have about myself. I thanked her and when she left, after a new lecture on being too busy, I shoved the magazines into a drawer. I just wanted to forget them and go about my day.

The next day, I was talking to a good friend. We have daughters the same age but there is about a 10 year age difference between us with her being the older one. We try to touch base about twice a month, keep current on the families and what each daughter is doing. She asked me advice on some skin care issues and I gladly rattled off what I have found to work and then our topic switched to fashion. She and I meet for coffee quite frequently and I usually run in with my latest fashion creation on. She is a more sedate fashion follower, and that's cool, too. To emphasize..I am not the 40 something who tries to follow the Britney Spears look circa 1995. That just looks desperate. But, I love clothes, love fashion, and don't dress like I am headed for the land of the lost woman. Anyway, she was telling me that she would like to jazz up her wardrobe a bit. BUT...not with trends or anything coming from....then a list of stores where I shop. Now, she did not do this in a wicked manner. She is always very complimentary to my fashion when we are out. But that remark along with the magazines from my mom has been bugging me...Just because I am one toe over the line to the second half of my 40s doesn't mean I am one step away from polyster, dull hair that needs to be bobbed off, a thick middle or a permanent spot in a recliner with a remote in hand while wearing sensible shoes.

Earlier in the week, I was just having a conversation with a friend about our mutual love of punk rock. I was recalling some really fab punk rock shows I had been to in the 80s and looking forward to some of those groups touring, this summer, and me going. I ask you....when does the Punk Rock Princess become the Punk Rock Grandma?

I do talk to so many people who hit my age and decided hey, this is it. This is where I draw the line. Had my fun, strutted my stuff, and now I am on the sidelines. WHAT???? I feel like I am just getting started and they are telling me that not only did they start, already, but they have also stalled. I won't have this way of thinking in my head. I also come into contact with some really cool and rocking 70 year olds and older. I want to be them. Forever fearless, still following their dreams, still rocking out, still dressing very cool, still kickin back the cocktail hour and discovering new heights.

I think that this shoud be the goal of everyone!! Don't stop being young. There is plenty of time to grow old but just don't stop being young. It's a trap and once you are in, there is no going back.

So, each morning when I wake up and keep asking myself...What's the story? I am going to keep answering...The story is tons of age cream, good food, good wine, lots of laughter, cool fashion, an overabundance of music and dancing and concerts, lots and lots of love and the same attitude that I had at 18!

That's the REAL story, Morning Glory....

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

New World

Well, that is a bit of an overstatement but there is a new president in town. Yes, last night's installation did happen and it went very well and I am now leading my little group into what could either be scary territory or great new horizons!! I hope to take the group down new roads, find new members, and explore possible new ways of doing things. So, I guess in a sense, this new president may want to explore a new world, of sorts.

I stand with gavel in hand, president's pin on my chest and a wine glass in the other hand. I think we are ready to rock with that combo. Actually, last night's ceremony was lovingly tailored to my personality and all of the incoming board members were given a wine personality, a little toast and a wine glass to take home. I am flattered that it was such fun. If nothing else, even if I fail my group, they know where to go for the best party. I joke, I joke.

I have some pretty awesome footsteps to follow to lead a group of awesome women. Now that I am out of denial and have wiped the stardust out of my eyes, I am ready to take control.

In my ever changing moods and my journey as the mom with more time, this is my first big step on that journey. I am sure that there will be funny mishaps, along the way, but I am hoping for more victories than failures!

It's a new time, a new president of my group, a new world to take on. I am up for the challenge so everyone should buckle up. It could be a bumpy ride along the way.

Madame President

Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Suddenly I See

Today is the's the day I become the president of my women's group. Two years ago, I was installed as the vice-president. I remember thinking, oh, I have plenty of time before the presidency rolls around. Two years is an eternity, no worries, that day will be so slow in getting here. NOT!!!

In my ever changing moods, I have never seen such a fast paced two years fly by. And here I am. It wasn't an eternity and now my group is going to be looking to me for leadership, after tonight. Since I thought this night would be a long time coming, as usual, I am approaching it with that deer in the headlights look. Sirens sounding off, wide eyes, my great fake it approach where everyone THINKS I know what I am doing but in reality....again...I fly by the seat of my pants and can fake a great presidential persona. The older I get, the better I am at looking like I totally understand things. The reality is that I go a bit blank behind my eyes with fear. I mean, I always rise to the occassion, do my work, do my research and give it my best shot. I just am not the person you would peg as being the official one. If you see me, I look more like the official party planner. Not the official president.

This is a great group of women and we do great things for women. It's a very well established group and most of them have been together for years and years. I was installed as a member about 6 years ago. See...I don't even remember my own installation year. I hope that they don't mind the new girl on the block asking a lot of questions because I will have them. I hope they won't mind the way I take meeting notes on cocktail napkins. The past few meetings I have tried to bring an official notebook to look like I know what I am doing. But, I am who I am, and that is a cocktail note taking girl. The whole official notebook thing just messed me up. It drove me insane and I couldn't find any of the information I needed.

I am officially better off not trying to be too official. It's not who I am. So, if they are ready to welcome me into the new role as president, I hope they can welcome my spin on being a president. I want good things for the group, I want to see some growth, I want us to continue with our good deeds in the community, I want the community to get to know us a bit better and I want us all to bond and have fun while doing business.

Wait!!!! Maybe I am ready to take this on!!! Maybe I really do have a handle on what is to be done and my role in doing it. I am not saying that it will be a smooth ride and I am not saying that I will not make laugh-worthy mistakes but I do think I can take this and run with it. All of a sudden, it is sinking in...maybe I really am ready to be in charge.

Monday, May 10, 2010

Something I Should Know all listen to me ramble on and ramble on and put my thoughts to music, almost everyday. So, this evening, I am giving you, my loyal fans, that I LOVE and ADORE so much, a chance to speak up, tell me a bit about yourselves and help me with a project.

In my ever changing moods, my passion is music. I am currently getting ready to work on my summer playlists for convertible driving, party hopping and all around groovin' music. Sooooooo, I want each and every one of you, my fans and readers to speak up and tell me your fav song for summer! The song that kicks you into action, that makes your heart sing, that signals summer weather and the livin' is GRAND. I will compile my playlist according to your favs and then I will post the summer playlist with credits to you. It will be the Official My Ever Changing Moods Summer of 2010 Playlist!!!! I want to see your names and sweet smiling faces and great tune choices!!! Make it fun and let me get to know you!! You can comment, here, or on the fan page....

Let's make the summer of 2010 rock!!!!!!


Today I am swamped with trying to get the everyday things done, clean up after two Mother's Day celebrations, yesterday, and getting things ready for my women's group, tomorrow night. It is our end of the year installation dinner where your's truly will be installed as their new president. Should they be alarmed? Well, only if flying by the seat of their pants scares them. Flying at high speeds, by the seat of my pants, in control and freak out mode are how I attack things. Basically, I am great under pressure!!

In my ever changing moods, I have come to the realization that I am a multi-tasking, control freak, non-delegating machine. And, oddly, this makes me happy. I seem to gain more and more energy with each passing year. I know that I fuel up on coffee, a lot, during the day, but this energy comes from, inside. Caffeine is my great friend to get me through the day but I truly am a controlling maniac.

Looking back, I think I have always had these tendencies. I don't like to rely on the help of other people. I like to attack the job at hand and like a dog with a bone, I am not happy until I have seen every detail to the end. I plan soirees like this, I plan dinners like this, I complete tasks like this and I push the cheerleader like this. I like to take it all on and leave nothing for any committee members to even help with.

It's not that I think I am the best at what is being done. Well, not totally, but I like to plan the details of projects and then I execute each detail. People will offer to help or even try to force me to hand over some of the responsibility but I can't. I need to know that my vision is being carried out, that it is being done the way I want it and then I want to see the results of my vision. If I try to explain how I want it done or how I want it to look, I get so flustered that I just want to do it, myself.

I am very determined and remember this being a breaking point for my mother in my nursery school/early elementary days. She would get so exasperated when I wouldn't go to bed until every dress/shoe/outfit was in place in my Barbie Townhouse closet. When I dressed my Barbie, she had to match. I remember being very nervous about a certain pair of gold lame Barbie wedges that I lost. I wouldn't let Barbie wear her gold lame shift dress if I couldn't find her shoes. When I went to nursery school, a few days later, my teacher was holding the tiny shoes in the palm of her hand to return to me. I felt a calmness come over me and all was right in my world. I am like that with my own clothes and outfits. I know if something is off with something in my closet or if I don't remember seeing a certain dress, etc. hanging in my closet. I cannot rest until I am assured that all of my clothing, shoes and bags are all happy and accounted for.

Planning a party is just as obsessive. I plan themes down to the last detail. I begin planning the decor, the food, the signature drink of the evening, my outfit, the music, the movie that will be shown on the tvs, in each room, on mute. But, the movie must coincide with said theme and carefully planned music. I totally missed my calling and should have been a party planning/wardrobe consulting/personel shopper dynamo!!

So, today, I am in all of my glory. Pulling out my hair over the right color scheme for tomorrow night. The most fun playlist to burn on cds for gift bags. It had to be the perfect combo of perfect summer songs. I needed to find the right color of candles to be strategically arranged among the perfectly planned flowers in just the right vases with matching colored water to correspond to each flower color. I have a theme that I want to run throughout the evening and I wanted that theme to be ever present. And, of course, what nutcase of soiree planning wouldn't be wearing a dress to tie it all in??

I am working at a fast pace, juggling everything that comes my way, today. I am a controlling blur of energy that is happiest when I am under pressure.

Saturday, May 8, 2010

Gimme Shelter

It's Saturday!! Hope that in your area you are having groovy weather. We are having the kind of high winds that could take the roof off of the house and we are losing branches off of trees at Maggie's Farm. It was hard to even sleep with all of the noise.

So, how appropriate for my Suggestions on Saturday. I was going to suggest this most powerful rockumentary, anyway, until I realized that these winds will make you want to run for shelter.

If you love The Rolling Stones, like I do, you will love this ultimate documentary of a very specific time in rock history. It was to be a film of the Rolling Stones and their 1969 tour. It started out to be what was billed as the best rockumentary ever made. It is that, in my opinion, but it had such a tragic turn of events that it became epic for other reasons. Watch the powerful Stones and absorb the music.

Love In Vain is one of my fav Stones songs of all times. It is a cover of a 1930's Robert Johnson blues song. The Stones set to their own groove.

So, if you are having a chilly Saturday in May and just want to curl up on the sofa, check out the movie and tunes...

Again, these music, book and movie suggestions are all just from me. They are what I like and I like to share them with you on Suggestions On Saturdays. Just my opinions on the things that I like that ramble around in my head.

Friday, May 7, 2010

My Back Pages

This morning, I was watching an episode of one of my guilty pleasures on television. The show is a Bravo reality show and is one of the Real Housewives installments. Anyway, one of the women on last night's episode was dealing with a family health crisis. I know, who doesn't, at one point, deal with that. This hit me rather odd, though, because the family member was her father. The father that she has not seen, heard from, or even knows. She seems to have lived her life and her attitude has always been, it is what it is. She dealt with things and moved on. She got a call that he was ill and lived across the country. She went and spent what were his last days with him. One of her lines was that she was dealt this hand of cards and now that there was closure, she didn't have to look at the cards, again. Her father passed away right after this. I do not have her exact statement but that was the idea of it. I sort of sat there and paused the show. It is my life. And how odd to be staring at it on the television. And how odd to never have thought, before, about what will happen on the day that my actual father is no longer alive? It has haunted me all day.

I posted a while back about the fact that my father left. It was what it was, I moved on, dealt, and lived my life. I am not a cold person but I knew that when he moved on, he really moved on. He did't want to be a part of us, any longer. He didn't want to be a father. What else was an almost 8th grader going to do? I accepted it, I cried a bit, but he wasn't going to come back. He kept up a sort of pretense for a few years of being a dad who cared but he grew tired of even trying to be an every other weekend father. It didn't work for him and little by little he was out of my life. I could either sit and cry the rest of my life or I could get it together and explore my life on my own. I have carved families out of friends, I am lucky to have married Mr. Man and found a family that knows how to love. I am a mother and my greatest HOPE in life is that I have given my daughter all of the love and understanding and guidance that I did not have. People often ask me how I could walk away and not be bitter. It's a choice. You can let bitterness take over and eat you up and consume your life. Or, you can put the pieces back together and trudge on by yourself. Life is what you make it and I was making it what I wanted and what I wanted was to be happy. I figure that my parents married and had me and my brother. If nothing else, they were meant to be together, just for that. So, I went on my way and with each year, not seeing him or having a relationship got easier. Now, he is a man that I once knew through child eyes. He doesn't know anything about the adult me or really has no idea how I live my life or how I raise my child or how I love my marriage. But, I figure he was the adult, all of those years ago, and he made his choice and ultimately made my choice for me.

So, what really struck me during the episode of the show, was the question that I have never really thought about. What WILL happen on the day that he passes? How do you grieve the father that you don't know? And, would he even want you to grieve him? I don't know his other child. I don't know his wife. I guess I would just be the unknown girl standing by. After all, isn't that what I have been ever since he drifted off? The unknown girl just standing by and waiting? This girl got tired of standing by and waiting so she went and built frienships and relationships with people who really did want her. I guess I will deal with it when the day comes but it's definitely on my mind, right now...

Thursday, May 6, 2010

Little Less Conversation

I think that there comes a time in all of our lives when we feel the need to go through and evaluate people in our lives. Sometimes we do this in friendships, sometimes we do this in a marriage, sometimes we do this with a doctor or a dentist and sometimes we are forced to do it with, gasp, a hairstylist. I say the last one only with a small amount of humor because I NEED my very competent hairstylist. Just ask Mr. Anyway, these situations all usually stem from growing apart, having an argument, losing the love, just not working for you.

Then, as I am finding in my ever changing moods, there is the person that you just don't know what to do with or how to place them in your life. The older I get, the easier it is to look at all of my present relationships and sort out my feelings and deal accordingly. But, there is one stumbling block that always pops up and makes me wonder....where do you put someone who was friend/enemy/frenemy/arse? I know, I know, the easy solution is to do the big slice out of your life. But, in some instances, it's not that simple. And that makes it tough for this black and white girl. I tend not to like the gray area. I like everything one way or the other but not limbo. It sounds a bit rigid but it is how my mind works in these situations. I have to, because of underlying issues, continue in a relationship with this person but it baffles me as to how to act around and towards this situation.

It makes it harder when this person only listens to herself. She toots her own horn, her kids are perfect, she feels she is so intelligent, she doesn't listen. And, if she seems to be listening, she will ask you the very same question in her next sentence to prove that she was not listening. She will talk in a whiny voice and has an illness a day. You are forced to listen to her go on and on about nothing or about her recent doctor and ER trips. She is that sticky sweet personality on the outside but will wield a knife in your back the instant you turn around. Yes, I still have the knife marks to prove it. There is no arguing a point or discussing anything with her because she is always right. And yet, knows nothing of what she speaks. She doesn't handle herself very well in social settings so to cover up that fact, she talks, talks, talks, talks and talks to the brink of insanity. But, when you feel that this person is a friend, you try to overlook things and even make excuses for her to other people.

Then, if you have something that she wants or if she wants a situation you are in, instead of discussing it and getting things out in the open or even allowing the other person to assure her that she has nothing to worry about, she takes matters into her own hands and causes hurt feelings, anger, and a vow to never deal with her on any level, again. And, that is successful for awhile. But then circumstances draw you back into her web. Except, this time you are smarter and wiser and see right through her. You don't like her, trust her or even want to hear the babble that she comes up with. This is where it gets murky on what kind of relationship you have.

In her mind, just because you are able to speak to her, smile at her and carry on a slight conversation, you are bffs, again. Not so. But, not wanting to cause a big war, I continue to smile and converse about trivial things. I know that she will never reach my inner level of friendship, again. I keep her at an arms length and let her talk so much that even she finally tires of herself.

What do you call this relationship? Why is it so hard to try to endure these kinds of relationships? I actually am on countdown mode until the very day when my life does not have to interact with her life. I think what makes it so hard for me is my inability to live in the gray zone. With me, you are either in or you are out. This really tests me. I am in a quandry each time we have to connect.

I think it would be easier if she wasn't the type of person who is so full of herself. If she took some time to just breathe and be silent and not act like a toddler when she is not getting her way.

I am reading a book about fashion and manners and in the book, the author makes a statement that is so true and it reminded me of the relationship I have with this former says something to the effect that it is always the person who is the loudest and so full of herself that always thinks she is the life of the party. Or the most popular or the most intelligent. When, actually, it is better to have a bit of mystery about you, actually listen to what your friends are saying, quit talking at people and start talking to people. Stop bragging and just try to sit and smile. Don't go behind someone's back. Politely ask this person if you can talk and find out the truth in a situation. It is never nice or polite to stab your so called friend when she isn't looking. Try to be the kind of friend that you want to have.

In my ever changing moods, I will continue with this relationship just for the sake of others. I have no name for it, I don't even know how to converse in it but it would make it much easier if the other person didn't think she was such a legend and actually just sat, silently, and let the world revolve around others for just a minute.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Basket Case

Yesterday, after getting caught up around the house with all of the things that got put on the back burner for prom, I ventured out on just a routine afternoon of errands. I didn't have a lot of time so I decided to just stay local and not try to venture to the bigger cities that provide shops more to my liking. It was going to be an easy task of stopping at various places, grabbing what I needed and going home. But, by the time I did arrive home, I was truly in a basket case state of mind.

In my ever changing moods, I find that more and more I seem to run into nothing but rude behavior. Rude, crass, vulgar, and just really mean people out there. There are the people who seem to think that they and what they are doing is more important than anything anyone else has to do. If they are not gaining the attention that they think they deserve, they resort to yelling and nastiness to get their way. I feel bad for some of these store employees that have to listen to these kinds of people on a daily basis. Maybe that is why so many people that are store employees are rude, themselves. If I have a question about something, it is because I truly do need an answer or some help. I am sorry that my question is interrupting your important conversation with the employee beside you about how drunk and wasted you were on Saturday night. Yes, I know....important stuff. It is silly of me to think that my question should be of any concern to you or your establishment.

When I first got a job at the age of 16, customer service was THE most important thing. You needed to be trained, gain knowledge of the place you were working at and of the products you were selling. You stood, spoke to the customer, smiled, were friendly and could actually answer questions the customer had. The customer was made to feel like a king or a queen. Sometimes, not always, it feels like the customer is the last person the employees want to see and if they are called upon for any knowledge, well, that is just the last straw with some of them.

People out in public on cell phones is another rude thing that has hit a boiling point with me. Yes, calls come in and some are important and require your attention. I like to excuse myself, move to the nearest exit, take care of the phone call and then rejoin the public sans phone call. I was in one store, last week, and was forced to listen to a woman talk on her cell phone like she was sitting in the privacy of her own home. I had to hear about the knock down, drag out fight she had with her guy, and then I was treated to a string of words about the guy that made my hair stand on end. It is NOT all right to use profanity, in public, AT ALL. I made my way to the check out area where I was treated to a cashier and a MANAGER shooting the breeze and peppering their conversation with the same type of profanity. And, neither of them looked or smelled like they had seen soap, shampoo or a shower in quite some time. As I was getting my money out to pay, I had to listen to them decide what to order for lunch while the cashier cleaned out the dirt in her fingernails.

This rudeness is not just in the stores. I was meeting someone for lunch, two weeks ago, and was in the cross walk to cross the street to the restaurant. There is a sign that clearly says to stop if a pedestrian is in the crosswalk. That would have been me at that particular time. But, a driver who apparently saw me as a mere irritant, sped through the crosswalk and then yelled at me. Not just yelled...she called me a few choice names. Ummm...???

So, yesterday, in the midst of the rudeness, mean people, total disregard for anyone but their very important selves, I had a man approach me and get all in my business about how I should let him in front of me in the check out line because he had one item and I had five. Um, okay, pushy. I would have let him or anyone except I don't like to be told I should do it. And, the only reason I was in the check out aisle and not at the UScan was that the UScan was being used for people who had overloaded carts...and didn't know how to use a UScan....and decided to make it everyone's problem until they could locate help. Meanwhile, Mr. Pushy wanted to strike up a conversation and point out that the organic items and fresh veggies I was purchasing were very, very expensive and maybe I should consider buying cheaper versions. Um, did I ask him to pay for my items? Did I ask him to eat the food? Again...when did everyone start having an opinion about everything and then feel like they need to make this opinion a public matter. My veggies, my money, buzz off.

I wish we could return to the days of please, thank you, mind your own business, be kind, be patient, smile at people, hold doors, put others before you, say you are sorry, say excuse me, shower, put your best foot forward and just be kind. If everyone was just kind, can you imagine what a nice place we would be living in?

I am a kind and patient person. I don't push myself on people. I don't put my needs before anyone else's needs. I have opinions and views but keep those to myself. I don't push my views on politics, religion, anything on anyone. I grew up in a time when that was conversation that stayed private. When I am out and about and asked to give my opinions on these kinds of things, I find it rude. I have my views but I like keeping them nice and tidy and just to myself.

I hope that we can once again start teaching by example. Maybe people will stop acting so rude if they notice more and more people around them who are not acting rude. If they witness kindness, patience and compassion, maybe they will readjust their way of thinking and acting. If they witness one door being opened for someone out of kindness, maybe it will encourage them to do the same.

I don't have the answers and I have no idea how a large portion of society got to this point of being able to act this way. But, if we each, today, started to do one nice thing and acknowledged a nice thing being done for us and if we helped someone and then acknowleged someone helping us, it would be a step in the right direction. Maybe it would start a big chain reaction so that by the time you finally reach your home after a long day of errands, you will feel less like a basket case.

Monday, May 3, 2010

Dancing Queen

Prom 2010 is officially over, here at home. The cheerleader had a smashing time and came home with many funny stories for us. She and her friends all looked so beautiful and it was so hard to stand and take pictures and realize that they are almost done with junior year and will soon be seniors! Wait, wasn't I just walking her down the long path at the preschool? Wasn't she just wearing matchy Gymboree outfits? Wasn't she just driving around her Cozy Coupe and then her Barbie Jeep? When did I become the mom of this beautiful, grown up girl??? I know the question has been asked a million times but...Where does the time go?

I was an older mom when I had the cheerleader. I was almost 30. Mr. Man and I were older getting married, too. We lived our carefree youth days, lived a carefree couple of years of being married and then decided to have the cheerleader. I was and still am lucky enough to have been able to stay home with her all during her growing up. Since she is our only, it allowed me to have a close bond with her. We had lots of playtimes in parks and swimming and at the beach and in the neighborhood. Each milestone she crossed, I was right there! Walking, potty training, preschool, kindergarten, junior high, high school. I was with her for her many accomplishments and I was with her for her defeats. I got to see her smile. I got to see her cry. I have had to learn to take steps back so that she could begin her own journey. It has been a hard year, for me, as she really came into her independence, this year. We have butted heads, there has been anger and eye rolling and a general feeling of her thinking that I am so lame. I have had to learn to approach every subject or conversation on a light note just so it doesn't sound like it's going to be the lecture that it really is. I have had to choose my battles. It has been a rollercoaster of emotions, this year. Good, bad, sad, happy, proud, disappointed. It's all been there rolled up into a big ball of exploding fury.

On Saturday, in the midst of prom preparation, I got a surprise. I had no idea this surprise was coming and I had no idea how happy this surprise would make me. She needed me!!!!! Surprise!!!! And, I am not talking about needing me for money or a ride or to hold her bags while she was busy. She actually needed my input, my love, my reassurances, my complete adoration!!! She really, really seemed to like me, again!!! We had the funniest conversations while waiting at her nail appointment. We spent time on the cell phone while she was waiting at another appointment and I was running to pick up flowers. She wanted me to SIT AND TALK TO HER while she was at her hair appointment getting hair extensions and curled and coiffed!! When we got home she wanted me to help her into her dress and let me take as many pictures as I wanted. When her friends and their parents were all here, she didn't get embarrassed of my picture taking! She let me call her my pet was like the preschool girl was in the body of the grown up girl and the preschool girl was the girl that thought her mom hung the moon!!

Prom is such a magical time. It's the time of year that signals the beginning of the end of the school year. It's a time for the juniors to really realize that next year, they will be all that and a bag of chips. It's a time for the seniors to be both happy that it is all about to end and sad that it is all about to end. It's a bittersweet magic for all of the kids.

Prom 2010 will forever remain in my ever changing moods as the prom where, once again, it was just my little girl and me. Even for just a moment, she was that sweet 4 year old with golden hair skipping and hopping around and giving me giant hugs and sticky kisses. Once the limo drove away, I was left feeling both elated and yet a little sad. I knew that the magic of the day would not be there forever but I wanted to savor it for as long as I could.

In my mind, once the preschool girl climbed into the limo, I knew she would be the dancing queen when she got out of the limo. And, it should be that way. I was just happy that for one day, the magic of her childhood came back for a visit.

Saturday, May 1, 2010

Pretty In Pink

Today is Saturday and it is also PROM around here!! What better movie and song to suggest? Although, the cheerleader is wearing sparkly green, I cannot rewrite the movie to be, Pretty In Green. But, Pretty In Pink IS the ultimate prom movie so I thought it would be much more fitting than the other ultimate prom movie, Carrie. I am sure you will agree.

In my ever changing moods, this movie is one that I could watch over and over. The 80s vibe and the 80s soundtrack still transport me back in time.

Enjoy your weekend, if it's prom weekend for you, live it up!! If the rain has you stuck in the house, why not watch this movie. I just bet you will be dancing around and singing the songs at the top of your lungs. On a side note, there is wide belief that the lead singer of The Psychedelic Furs could be the love child of Mick Jagger and David Bowie....I tend to agree...awesome!!

Happy Saturday and Happy Prom 2010!!