Monday, May 3, 2010

Dancing Queen

Prom 2010 is officially over, here at home. The cheerleader had a smashing time and came home with many funny stories for us. She and her friends all looked so beautiful and it was so hard to stand and take pictures and realize that they are almost done with junior year and will soon be seniors! Wait, wasn't I just walking her down the long path at the preschool? Wasn't she just wearing matchy Gymboree outfits? Wasn't she just driving around her Cozy Coupe and then her Barbie Jeep? When did I become the mom of this beautiful, grown up girl??? I know the question has been asked a million times but...Where does the time go?

I was an older mom when I had the cheerleader. I was almost 30. Mr. Man and I were older getting married, too. We lived our carefree youth days, lived a carefree couple of years of being married and then decided to have the cheerleader. I was and still am lucky enough to have been able to stay home with her all during her growing up. Since she is our only, it allowed me to have a close bond with her. We had lots of playtimes in parks and swimming and at the beach and in the neighborhood. Each milestone she crossed, I was right there! Walking, potty training, preschool, kindergarten, junior high, high school. I was with her for her many accomplishments and I was with her for her defeats. I got to see her smile. I got to see her cry. I have had to learn to take steps back so that she could begin her own journey. It has been a hard year, for me, as she really came into her independence, this year. We have butted heads, there has been anger and eye rolling and a general feeling of her thinking that I am so lame. I have had to learn to approach every subject or conversation on a light note just so it doesn't sound like it's going to be the lecture that it really is. I have had to choose my battles. It has been a rollercoaster of emotions, this year. Good, bad, sad, happy, proud, disappointed. It's all been there rolled up into a big ball of exploding fury.

On Saturday, in the midst of prom preparation, I got a surprise. I had no idea this surprise was coming and I had no idea how happy this surprise would make me. She needed me!!!!! Surprise!!!! And, I am not talking about needing me for money or a ride or to hold her bags while she was busy. She actually needed my input, my love, my reassurances, my complete adoration!!! She really, really seemed to like me, again!!! We had the funniest conversations while waiting at her nail appointment. We spent time on the cell phone while she was waiting at another appointment and I was running to pick up flowers. She wanted me to SIT AND TALK TO HER while she was at her hair appointment getting hair extensions and curled and coiffed!! When we got home she wanted me to help her into her dress and let me take as many pictures as I wanted. When her friends and their parents were all here, she didn't get embarrassed of my picture taking! She let me call her my pet was like the preschool girl was in the body of the grown up girl and the preschool girl was the girl that thought her mom hung the moon!!

Prom is such a magical time. It's the time of year that signals the beginning of the end of the school year. It's a time for the juniors to really realize that next year, they will be all that and a bag of chips. It's a time for the seniors to be both happy that it is all about to end and sad that it is all about to end. It's a bittersweet magic for all of the kids.

Prom 2010 will forever remain in my ever changing moods as the prom where, once again, it was just my little girl and me. Even for just a moment, she was that sweet 4 year old with golden hair skipping and hopping around and giving me giant hugs and sticky kisses. Once the limo drove away, I was left feeling both elated and yet a little sad. I knew that the magic of the day would not be there forever but I wanted to savor it for as long as I could.

In my mind, once the preschool girl climbed into the limo, I knew she would be the dancing queen when she got out of the limo. And, it should be that way. I was just happy that for one day, the magic of her childhood came back for a visit.

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