Tuesday, September 28, 2010

My Ever Changing Moods

Today is Day 2 of The Challenge...

What is the meaning behind your blog name?

When I decided to start this blog, last February, I was beginning a new journey in my life. I am the mom of an only and that only was beginning to spread her wings. She got her driver's license, she was growing up and growing more independent. My job as full time driver/calendar monitor/planner/even nutritionist was starting to change. She needed me and yet she didn't need me. I fought it, at first, but then when I took a step back, I saw the independent butterfly that was emerging and ready to take life on, on her own terms. I had no choice...I had to give her a bit of independence. But, it also meant that I had to question what was next for me? Who was I now? Where was I going? How did I get here? Did I like me? Where was I taking my life?

You see, mothers of an only are different from mother's of multiple kids. Our only is our life. Not so much in the helicopter sense but the only is the only one we have to focus on. We get used to being there, only for them. Hey...how many times can I use the word, only?? So, when that mom isn't looking, the only grows up. My only is a very mature only because she has been raised by J and myself and we never really baby-downed to her. We communicated on a more adult level, she was my only child and I was a SAHM so she and I spent hours and hours reading books, playing games, building skills, working on word problems and all of that fun stuff. By preschool, she was rocking and rolling and bored. So, she tested out and went to K when she was 4. She has never looked back. It was all good until she decided that she was grown up, last year. But, it happens and it is bittersweet and you are proud. And then you look at life.

So, I had all kinds of emotions and had all kinds of thoughts running through my head and had all kinds of paths to travel, things to conquer, and interests to explore. Many moods to dwell on. My ever changing moods.

Here I am, 7 months later, and my life has changed totally!! I have my business, I am out in the community making new contacts, building a name, became president of my women's group, I am in control and taking charge and loving every minute of it.

So, the only is now a senior and the college applications are looming. Senior pictures are being scheduled and this year presents a lot of last times. But, I am looking at it all with a new sense of purpose and a new sense of empowerment. I know that in my ever changing moods, there isn't much that I can't take on!!

This blog and the name behind this blog have been a great help in taking all of the new steps and the new steps to come. Thanks for coming along for the ride.


Pamela said...

I should clarify....after reading, this again, I did not mean to say that moms of more than one child do not focus on them. My meaning is that once the only is grown and more independent, that's all there is and no more kids to turn to, after that. The only is the sole focus and then, zip...lol

Dawn said...

....and ZIP, my only is all grown up! Time flies.